Black & Kinky Amongst Brown Waves


poem/ toast of the week: to the lads…
February 1, 2012, 12:09 am
Filed under: performance | Tags: ,

it’s that time of year again!

this past saturday i celebrated Burns Night, an annual commemoration of the life of the Scottish poet Robert Burns, who was born on January 25, 1759. the day also celebrates Burns’ general contributions to Scottish culture and there is a lot of ritual attached with the festivities. there is a menu, an agenda (with an order of speeches and toasts), lots of whiskey drinking and poetry. all good. i was nominated to wrote a toast to the gentleman gathered and the poem/ toast below was what i came up with. so dust off your best scottish accent, and give it a whirl. it’s a toast, so it should be read out loud.

Toast to the Lads
© 2012 by margaux delotte-bennett

to be honest
toasting the lads scared me a bit
to fashion a rhyme that balanced sarcasm and wit
I am a poet who oft rejects rhyme
deconstructing themes of race and body most of the time

but lads should be celebrated
and lads should be mocked
as my research on burns night toasts on youtube taught

the lads gathered here are quite a lot
they are photographers, computer geeks, business men, teachers – no cops
they are men of leisure and men of wine
because they seem to be hosting drinking excursions
all of the time

they are lads that dine and lads that love
who travel the world
and dance with a twirl
and hike up cliffs
and camp until stiff
and ski and cook
and laugh and look
but I seldom hear of any of them reading a proper book

this urban tribe through dear Ryan I was introduced
is full of lads of honor, I deduce
because for all your whiskey and homemade beer imbibing
there have been no wife swaps
no fist fights
no loud and raunchy vibe-ing
no uninvited bottom pinching unawares
just hungry side eyes and amorous stares

and therein lies the problem with this group of lads
a woman’s virtue is too safe amongst you
what are you, cads?

even still, let us raise our glasses to this sorry lot
and be thankful for this gathering, perverts or not
because many of us lassies would have given it up
if we were ever propositioned or properly caught

to the lads!

photo by gareth wade

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2 Comments so far
Leave a comment

I love it! A bit of a departure from the usual, a bawdy, rhyme-y toast! I did have oatmeal on Burns Day, though it was just in a bowl, not stuffed in a sheep’s gut. . . love you!

Comment by mh

i love the poem. and I loved reading it aloud. the twist at the end is great. a perfect drinking toast in the Scottish tradition!

Comment by Rose




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