Black & Kinky Amongst Brown Waves

reflections on my first (foster) mother’s day
May 12, 2019, 12:10 pm
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things have been quiet on this blog for a spell, but there was something that I wanted to share before this day was done…


reflections on my first (foster) mother’s day
(c) 2019 by margaux delotte-bennett

of all the things you have given me
(and you have given me so much
little one)
the greatest gift is the title of mommy
a designation so full and ripe
and mine
for the first time

it’s as if you are settled into the womb of my love
connected and drawn by my every move
both subtle and gross

each day we spend together I bare witness to you birthing a new you
with unique possibilities you are
dreaming into reality
we don’t know what will unfold
but we are walking there
hand in hand
heart in heart

you often tell me that I’m a good mommy
and I wonder what your little spirit
feels and knows
how I truly measure up to
the one that gave you life
the one that shares your blood
and your face

you now share my musical tastes
and all my space
even when I want to retreat
to only taking care of myself
that distant reality left on a shelf
with my dancing shoes

and so today
on my first (foster) mother’s day on this side of visibility
I thank you for the gifts you have already bestowed:

-a cuddle in my bed 30 minutes before I wanted to get up
-a piece of your watermelon attached the end of your spit gleaming fork
-using my legs as a chair as you watch cartoons
-all the little songs you created with words like auntie, booty, love and meow in them
-the silly dance you said you would teach me later
-the endless supply of kisses and hugs that flow between us throughout our days

I have been engaged in mothering work for years
but you made me a mommy
and I’m eternally grateful
for that truth
this life
our path

a new poem and an event!
June 5, 2018, 1:42 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

hello poetry friends!

I’m going to be performing a few poems next week at my local library. It is one of the events connected with an exhibition called “The Soul Tent: a Resurrection City Installation Project.” This is a traveling exhibit to four library branches to educate the public on the 50th Anniversary of the 1968 Poor People’s Campaign. There will be live events, story collecting, workshops, all connected to this theme. At the Woodridge Library there will be a screening a Nina Simone documentary and I have been asked to warm up the audience and give some poetic reflections about Ms. Simone’s life and times.

More info about the larger event can be found here.

Info about my specific poetry performance can be found here: MDB Nina Library event 6.12.18

and now for a completely unrelated poem.


what lingers
© 2018 by margaux delotte-bennett

though I no longer love you
the me that you revealed I do adore
she still lives
still responds to the name you gave her
still shows up and shows out
in the ways you encouraged

I underhand her brilliance at times
dim her down
aiming to make her more palatable
though you consumed her like fire
never flinching
always hungry
each glimpse a tasty morsel
as she eeked her way out of their too small reference/ frame

she is the same, but more authentic
self directed
as we all tend to be in safer/ braver spaces

though I no longer love you
I love who you inspired me to be
and thankfully
that does not only sit
in bittersweet memory

napowrimo rewind, 23 of 30
May 21, 2018, 10:13 am
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i started this poem in april and never finished it.
it may still be unfinished, but i wanted to make sure that 30 poems were created and shared in my little online universe in 2018. due to the rigor of a daily challenge, i find that my poems tended to be shorter. this one was longer and i was able to add more to it as i posted it here.

happy reading and happy writing!

precious Pearl
(c) 2018 by margaux delotte-bennett

there is much about his family
that i don’t know
he being the man who helped conceive me
but decided to leave me
by walking out of the frame before i turned 3

this man’s mother
known to be as valuable as her namesake pearl
as round
as hard
as free & needing of salt water & time
to be her truest self
Mama Pearl condensed to MP

she came to the big city from Jamaica
working as a hotel cleaner near a NY airport
joining the legions of women smelling of bleach
feet tired & swollen
marching the halls
disinfecting the stalls
trying to be swift, but only

she sent money back to the island nation
where her mother was raising her kids
american money able to buy finer things
more provisions
thoughts & dreams with a brush stroke of
big apple visions
that never brought intimacy
as her children grew & changed exponentially
more & more distant they seemed
each time she returned “home” from overseas

grandmother called Mama Lee
& she, mother, simply called “MP”
delineating roles & ranks for all to see

i remember monogramed towels
given or swiped
at the end of the night
from the fancy hotel

i remember feeling a distance
no recollection of cuddles & kisses
but still love
nurturing wrapped in resources shared freely

my mum remembers asking to borrow her salary
for a few days or up to a week
a request often granted
without a need to speak

MP, big of bone
and brown of hue
trapped in shell-like capitalist confines
scattered by the sea
yet still

napowrimo rewind, 24 of 30
May 9, 2018, 6:15 pm
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musings at tea time
(c) 2018 by margaux delotte-bennett

I drink my tea
with sugar from the plantations of yore
Continue reading

napowrimo rewind, 25 of 30
May 9, 2018, 6:11 pm
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the poem i’m avoiding
(c) 2018 by margaux delotte-bennett

the poem i’m avoiding
is filled with inconvenient truths
draped around the need to be seen one way
and known

how does one juggle the masks
when aiming to live
an authentic life?

you don’t.

laying down what no longer serves
is the invitation
and the destination.

truths known on the cellular level
spill forth without effort or

napowrimo rewind, 26 of 30
May 8, 2018, 10:08 am
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friendly reminder
(c) 2018 by margaux delotte-bennett

your joint open letters in support
of powerful men
only prove that the
to make one’s experience of violence
up for public debate
and then
once more.

napowrimo rewind, 27 of 30
May 8, 2018, 10:04 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

an ode to the headwraps of black women
(c) 2018 by margaux delotte-bennett

wrap your head in rainbows, sis!
protect your crown
or double triple its size
their eyes will learn to see
how regal you be
adorned or not

cover your dome, mama!
all that is seen is not understood
and stillness dwells without and within
your knowing knows how to win
sight unseen

twist and swoop that fabric, woman!
illustrate the road that brought you to your beauty
articles and research aside
desire resides inside
when you choose to elicit it